Snooze

I’ve been up and down and out of bed
Three times in the last 5 hours
Guilt and unease chase each other in my head
Each one steadily gaining power.
Nothing takes the pain away
Not pills or blood or booze
I’m cursing the man that I’ve become
As through the last 5 years I’ve snoozed.
Too wrapped up in my own charade
Too self-absorbed to truly see
That the one light in all my life
Was being slowly extinguished by me.